My name is Rashid. I’ve known Tyme for years but we just reconnected. She pissed me off. I decided to write about it on her blog. She let me. This is my first blog entry. I might do more of these.

I am not one to learn from other people’s experiences. Their life is different from mine. On Saturday night, I learned from Tyme’s experience. More accurately, I taught her the experience. It angered me so much I wanted to write about it. Something has to initiate change.

Tyme was gracious enough to attend a social event with me. We were having a great time considering it was a mix of business with socializing. I was standing with Tyme when a business associate came up and introduced himself. The three of us held a brief conversation until someone wanted to introduce Tyme to someone, causing her to excuse herself and leave. While she was leaving the man I was talking to said something like, “I don’t see how you stand working with her. I couldn’t do it. I’d be distracted wanting to hit that 24/7″ and laughed. I looked past his shoulder and I could see that Tyme heard him. She shrugged, rolled her eyes and smiled. To the man I was talking to, I changed the subject.

His remark bothered me but it wasn’t until later that his remark truly angered me. Talking to Tyme about it, she said that she hears it all the time. In the entertainment industry looks is a bonus. In business, gender and looks can be a curse. “It is what it is”…that is what she said. And that angered me even more.

Women shouldn’t receive the ultimate cock block because they were born with vaginas. The ultimate cock block. Since the man cannot stick his penis into her vagina, he does not want to work with her. What about her qualifications? What about the benefits to the company? What about her accomplishments? None of that matters because an immature insignificant son of a bitch “can’t” work with her because he’d get distracted? Where does that leave women since men have most of the powerful positions?

dis⋅crim⋅i⋅na⋅tion: treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit

What bothered me more was Tyme’s willingness to accept the discrimination. If women do not fight back, when will things change? When I asked Tyme about this, she shrugged saying it was the guy’s problem, not her problem. There wasn’t much she could do about it. Her Mom warned her about discrimination of women, especially black women, in business. She gave me excuses and believe me, the more excuses she gave for fucked up behavior, the angrier I became. Being a strong, independent, sexy, black female is something to be proud of. Tyme said if she was weak and stupid she probably would have gotten further in life because men wouldn’t be so intimidated.

On Sunday, I asked my sister if she experienced the same thing Tyme did? She said, “Of course. If I wasn’t born into money, I’d be broke and unemployed. That’s why many girls scout men based on their wallets. Why else do you think they did that? It’s an impossible fight for many women”. I asked them both why it doesn’t anger them and they gave similar answers: they would be angry on a daily basis and that isn’t healthy.

I was informed this morning that the same thing happens with technology. I looked for leading women (not hosted with a man) in technology and there are none. All the women I found had men by their sides but there are plenty of well known men in technology without a female in sight. Why doesn’t this double standard bother enough people to force change? Angry, I felt the need to publicly vent. Tyme replied, “You should start a blog” to which I replied, “How about I start with an entry on yours?” to which she shrugged.

I am ashamed that my gender acts this stupidly and cowardly. Afraid of getting their ass beaten in business by a girl. I am truly ashamed. We evolved past monkeys and animals centuries ago. What makes humans superior is our intelligence. Which we seem to be losing at a very rapid rate.